Picture this: I’m standing in the queue at Tesco last Tuesday, and this woman in front of me is having a proper row with someone on her phone. She’s going on about how “he needs his green juice at exactly 7:15 or he gets stroppy” and “don’t forget the meditation app has to be queued up before he wakes.” I’m thinking, blimey, sounds like she’s talking about a toddler. Turns out she was a celebrity assistant, and “he” was some A-lister whose name I can’t mention (legal reasons and all that).
Got me thinking though; what do these famous people actually do all day? Because let’s be honest, most of us imagine them lounging about in silk pyjamas eating caviar for breakfast. Spoiler alert: that’s not even close to reality.
Morning Madness (And I Mean Properly Early)
So here’s the thing that’ll shock you: most celebrities get up at stupid o’clock. I’m talking 4:30 AM kind of stupid. Jennifer Lopez apparently starts her day at 5 AM sharp. Five in the morning! I can barely function before 9, and she’s out there doing full workout routines while I’m still dreaming about my morning cuppa.
But why though? No, not because they are all masochists (well on the fence about that one!). That is because their days are pure insanity. With long days of filming and interviews and meetings with agents, those early hours can be the only moments of peace they have.
My cousin works at a swanky gym in Kensington, and she says celebrities only come in at about 6am when the only fans who would bother them are asleep, and so are any paps; otherwise, you’d never get any exercise done. Makes sense, doesn’t it? Just do a full workout while someone is attempting to photograph you doing squats.
The Fitness Thing (It’s More Complicated Than You Think)
Celebrity lifestyle habits around exercise are weird. Really weird. Some of them are proper fitness fanatics; Hugh Jackman still does those Wolverine workouts even though he’s done with the character.
Mental dedication, that.
Others? Not so much. There’s this whole industry built around making non-sporty celebrities look athletic. Personal trainers, nutritionists, and even people whose job it is to make sure the star doesn’t injure themselves walking to the gym. I kid you not.
What strikes me though is how many of them use exercise as therapy.
Emma Stone has talked about how running helps with her anxiety. Fair play to her; better than popping pills, innit? Though I suspect having a personal trainer makes it easier than the rest of us trying to motivate ourselves to jog round the local park in the rain.
Celebrity daily routine often include these mad expensive fitness gadgets too. Cryotherapy chambers, infrared saunas, machines that cost more than my car. But then again, when your entire career depends on how you look on camera, I suppose it makes sense to invest in the good stuff.
Work Days Are Properly Long
Here’s what nobody tells you about what celebs do daily; they work ridiculously long hours. Film shoots can go 14, 16 hours straight. Musicians spend months in studios perfecting albums. TV presenters might film three different shows in one day.
Take someone like Gordon Ramsay. Bloke’s got restaurants, TV shows, books, social media content; he’s working constantly. I saw an interview where he said he checks his phone at 4 AM to see how his restaurants performed the night before. That’s not glamorous, that’s just obsessive work ethic.
The funny bit is how they fill the waiting time. Actors spend hours in trailers between takes. Some read scripts; others play video games. I heard Benedict Cumberbatch does sudoku puzzles. Sudoku! Here’s this Shakespearean actor, and he’s doing number puzzles like my nan.
Musicians are different. They’re always working, even when they’re not “working”. Taylor Swift writes songs about everything: conversations, news stories, random thoughts. Must be exhausting having your brain constantly in creative mode.
Social Life? What Social Life?
The social aspect of celebrity life is tragic, honestly. They can’t just pop round to their mate’s house for a brew and a chat. Everything has to be planned, security arranged, NDAs signed sometimes. Imagine having to get your friends to sign legal documents just to come over for dinner!
So they end up socialising with other celebrities, because those are the only people who understand the madness. Hence all those photos of celebrity friend groups. It’s not that they’re being exclusive; they literally can’t have normal friendships without it becoming a media circus.
House parties are massive in celebrity circles. Private, controlled environment where they can actually relax. Though “relax” is relative when you’ve got a team of people managing your social media presence in real time.
Evening Routines (Finally, Some Normal Stuff)
This is where celebrities become almost human again. Evening routines are often surprisingly ordinary. They watch Netflix like the rest of us. They cook dinner (well, some of them do). They read books, call their mums, worry about mundane stuff.
Reese Witherspoon apparently has a book club. An actual book club! They discuss novels and everything. It’s probably the most normal thing any celebrity does, and good on her for it.
Sleep routines though; that’s where the money shows again. Silk sheets, temperature-controlled rooms, sleep specialists, meditation apps, white noise machines. Some celebrities have entire teams dedicated to making sure they sleep properly. Meanwhile, I’m lucky if I remember to set my alarm.
The Reality Check
A day in the life of a celebrity is not like it seems on Instagram. Yes, there are a few luxurious moments and some glitz. It’s mostly the work and pressure and trying to keep any semblance of privacy in a world full of paparazzi that are obsessed with your every move.
The successful ones treat it like any other job: show up, do the work, try to stay sane. The ones who don’t last are usually the ones who buy into their own hype or can’t handle the routine nature of it all.
After chatting with various people who work in the industry, I’ve realised something quite depressing: being famous looks absolutely knackering. The money’s nice, sure, but the trade-offs are massive. Every aspect of their lives is scrutinised, planned, managed.
So next time you see a celebrity complaining about their busy schedule, maybe cut them some slack. Their “busy” involves things like coordinating with multiple publicists just to go grocery shopping. Makes my Monday morning meetings seem like a doddle, doesn’t it?
Truth is, celebrity daily routine is part performance, part business, and part desperate attempt to stay human in an inhuman situation. And honestly? I think most of them are doing better at it than I would.
